Wednesday, April 26, 2006

.: Perils of Stupidity: Pyramid - A case Study :.

Let's get some things straight: I am not going to mince my words on this publication. I am going to offend a lot of people, but to the rest, I will make good sense.

So to get started, allow me to issue this statement:

All direct sales members / agents are frigging idiots.

Why, you ask ? The fact that you were conned into joining such a crap piece of outfit is the #1 obvious reason, of course. You were desperate, lazy and think you can become rich by doing minimal work. That says a lot about who you are.

Next, just think now. Just where in this fucking world can you actually get money for nothing? You were deceived by statements such as:

Small upfront investment
Money grows exponentially
No need for work
Your downlines will help you earn money
Be a part of a society with hundreds of thousands of "brothers and sisters united"

and last but not least,

Own your own business, gain financial freedom

Allow me to quickly and humbly voice my concerns about those crap above.

First, any investment, no matter how big or small, must have it's fixed Return On Investment (ROI) calculation. That's the very first lesson anyone learns in Financial 101. There is no such thing as "if you get more downlines, you can get your investment in less than xxx amount of time etc". So let's be a bit more blunt in this: in business or financial rules, there is not supposed to be any IFs and WHENs. When you invest any amount of money, and the ROI is not forseeable, then you need to assume you are flushing your hard earned cash down the drain.

Secondly, the statement that 'your money will grow exponentially' backed up by some form of pyramid drawings never fails to crack me up. NO proper and decent business model in this whole bloody world will tell you about money growing exponentially. Money does NOT grow. Basic economics will tell you that commodities (including money) gets transfered from one party to the other, or change form, but it does NOT grow. This means that in the very unlikely event that your money does indeed 'grow' exponentially, someone else is losing that money exponentially. Also, bear in mind that 'someone else' is most probably your best friend, family members or your other 'brother and sisters'. You are so called making money (if you make any at all, that is) at the unfortunate expenses of those closest to you. You see why I despise you ?

No need for work? You have gotta be shitting me. That is pure and utter bullshit, and anyone with a sane mind can see that. If the whole bloody world of 6.1 billion can sit around and watch their money grow by itself, we would have the End Of Days. Make no mistake about that.

No, you say. Your downlines will help you earn the cash after the number crosses a certain threshold, you explain. FUCK YOU, I say. So if you don't work, and they don't work, and neither does their other 'brother and sister united' downlines, where the FUCK is the money gonna come from? Only a weak mind with a desperate soul would believe in shit such as that. Think.

So you want to be a part of a big organization where all the members are considered "Brothers and Sisters in Arms?"? So desperate are you not, to be accepted, to be a part of something which seems so great and vast? Be reminded that you will be nothing but a part of a global con-men organization. A pawn who have to invest money to be a slave to the Organization. Makes sense to you?

And the part about your own business? That sounds good in name, but its gonna make you look like a bunch of clowns to people who are actually successful in the society.

So the next time some stupid bastard / bitch ask you out for a cup of coffee at the local Starbucks (which of course he/she would sit down and not order any drinks) to "look for a potential business partner in the Aromatherapy sector", ask, first and foremost, is he/she making money out of the business. If the answer is Yes, and if they add that they are earning a SHIT LOAD of it, tell them to bring along their last year's tax return form (EA form, in Malaysia).

I have had people whom I havent spoken to for the past 8 years calling me up in the middle of the night suddenly wanting to become my best friend, and also my 'business partner'. To you, oh dear friends, FUCK YOU, and FUCK OFF.

Last word of advice on evaluating whether you should even bother to talk to the bastard on the other line, ask yourself the following questions:

1. Let's say we put the products that they are selling into the regular shops in shopping malls, will it flunk out ?
2. Is the product grossly overpriced (mainly due to the vast 'commissions' payable) ?

If your answer is YES to both of the questions, then it is time you run. Run like there's no tomorrow.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

.: Top 11 List of All Time Favourites :.

11. The hot and intense moments, punctuated by drugs, boozes and birthday parties. Short, bittersweet, but memorable. 3/10

10. The elite untouchable back in high school. Well, I guess it was an honor that not many got to taste. Lovely, a tad a bit too short a time (but all good things usually are). 2/10

9. That virginal innocence which lasted till this day never fails to amaze me. Kind hearted, nice and naive. 2/10

8. How a room rental enquiry turned out to be entirely other things is definitely mind boggling, but it was definitely something of a way, way cool first time experience. 4/10

7. The stories about you and how you conquer.... and despite of me, I still made the mistake of not heeding it, and got "check-mated" within 2 hours. Love the screams. 6/10

6. If only your sibling knew......... Oh, and the shower incident. The best shower... EVER! 5/10

5. Being the only person who knew you before you lost that innocence makes it a total honor too in itself. Can never forget the car ride you gave me, and speaking of cars, can never forget the car adventures either. 6/10

4. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour. The method that we pulled off one of the greatest feats ever : cross platform mating call. LOVE IT... totally. 5/10

3. Possibly the only man to ever share a shower with you... for all eternity. Another superb feat. Superb. 5/10 (Projected)

2. I bow down to thee, for thee is the GODDESS OF SEX. The one, the only, the GREATEST. Will never forget the 7 in 18 hours, EVER. Nor will I forget the marvelous jobs. 10/10

1. The Queen of your college, the envy of most. The object of lust for all the guys. The ever so well timed flirtatious look, the beautiful arrogance, the silky smooth long hair. You are the greatest, most memorable, and definitely cherished for all time. Most memorable, however? The motorcycle ride. 7/10

Honorable Mention
Dancing Queen (5/10), Prudence (3/10) and Poet (6/10)

Marked for Future
The Forbidden One, The Almost Paradise and The Intellect